Gm D# twice
I know what you're all wondering
Gm GmHave Tripod ever been to Japan
EbBut you're ignoring a much bigger question
Why don't the Japanese have a space program
EbWhy aren't there any Japanese astronauts
Bb F# G#Have you ever seen a Japanese astronau________t
I'll tell you why you haven't seen one
EbI'll tell you why
Bb F Eb Gm
You can't do the Japanese Tea Ceremony when you're an astronaut
FIt's those damn fat gloves
And you can't do the Japanese Tea Ceremony when you're in zero grav
FCos the tea goes everywhere
GmThe tea goes everywhere
Gm Eb
Japanese culture's always fanscinated me
From their traditions to their modern way of life
EbBut all their elegance and rich history
BbDoesn't sit well with my interest in space
Bb F Eb Gm
Because you can't carry out a ninja style assassination dressed as an astronaut
It's the luminous fabric (you're too visible)
Bb F Eb GmAnd they don't let you use a samurai sword when you're an astronaut
FYou might puncture the suit
Gm
You might depressurize
Like a gremlin in a microwa_____ve
G# C#But it's those damn fat gloves
FThey're the main problem
You can't nurture your tamagotchi
F F#You can't make an origami swan
G# A BbM EbHave you ever tried to get a used panty vending machine into a space shuttle
Well I've tried and they don't let you
F#Fucking NASA red tape
Interlude:
Gm Eb
I couldn't reconcile the two things that I loved
GmSo I threw away my dreams of outer space
I had to find myself a whole new job
BbMaybe in the sports arena I would find a place
Bb F Eb Gm
But you can't do a Japanese Tea Ceremony when you're a boxing champ
FIt's those damned fat gloves again
Those confounded puffy mitts loom in front of my face every night in bed
FI'm haunted by fat gloves
BbYou can't drink sake, you can't do bukkake
Or ride a Kawasaki
Eb F#When you're an astronaut
F#(let ring) G#(let ring)
And they don't let you be an astronaut on Japanese tele
A#(let ring)
Cos you're not enough of a red herring
Capo 3rd fret version
Intro
Em C twice
Em C
I know what you're all wondering
Em EmHave Tripod ever been to Japan
But you're ignoring a much bigger question
GWhy don't the Japanese have a space program
CWhy aren't there any Japanese astronauts
Have you ever seen a Japanese astronau________t
AI'll tell you why you haven't seen one
CI'll tell you why
G D C Em
You can't do the Japanese Tea Ceremony when you're an astronaut
It's those damn fat gloves
G D C EmAnd you can't do the Japanese Tea Ceremony when you're in zero grav
DCos the tea goes everywhere
The tea goes everywhere
Back to verse
Em C
Japanese culture's always fanscinated me
EmFrom their traditions to their modern way of life
But all their elegance and rich history
GDoesn't sit well with my interest in space
G D C Em
Because you can't carry out a ninja style assassination dressed as an astronaut
DIt's the luminous fabric (you're too visible)
And they don't let you(Ooooh) use a samurai sword when you're an astronaut
DYou might puncture the suit
Em
You might depressurize
D Em EbLike a gremlin in a microwa_____ve
But it's those damn fat gloves
DThey're the main problem
Eb BbYou can't nurture your tamagotchi
You can't make an origami swan
F F# Gm CHave you ever tried to get a used panty vending machine into a space shuttle
C BbWell I've tried and they don't let you
Fucking NASA red tape
Interlude:
Em C Em C G C G C
I couldn't reconcile the two things that I loved
EmSo I threw away my dreams of outer space
CI had to find myself a whole new job
Maybe in the sports arena I would find a place
But you can't do a Japanese Tea Ceremony when you're a boxing champ
DIt's those damned fat gloves again
G D C EmThose confounded putty mitts loom in front of my face every night in bed
I'm haunted by fat gloves
GYou can't drink sake, you can't do bukkake
DOr ride a Kawasaki
When you're an astronaut
A#(let ring) C(let ring)
And they don't let you be an astronaut on Japanese tele
G(let ring)
Cos you're not enough of a red herri
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